Observations on the world today.

Wednesday, September 21, 2005

Queer Eye For The Straight God 

This is the funniest thing I have read in a long time.
Issue of 2005-09-26
Posted 2005-09-19

Day No. 1:

And the Lord God said, “Let there be light,” and lo, there was light. But then the Lord God said, “Wait, what if I make it a sort of rosy, sunset-at-the-beach, filtered half-light, so that everything else I design will look younger?”

“I’m loving that,” said Buddha. “It’s new.”

“You should design a restaurant,” added Allah.

Day No. 2:

“Today,” the Lord God said, “let’s do land.” And lo, there was land.

“Well, it’s really not just land,” noted Vishnu. “You’ve got mountains and valleys and—is that lava?”

“It’s not a single statement,” said the Lord God. “I want it to say, ‘Yes, this is land, but it’s not afraid to ooze.’ ”

“It’s really a backdrop, a sort of blank canvas,” put in Apollo. “It’s, like, minimalism, only with scale.”

“But—brown?” Buddha asked.

“Brown with infinite variations,” said the Lord God. “Taupe, ochre, burnt umber—they’re called earth tones.”

“I wasn’t criticizing,” said Buddha. “I was just noticing.”
The whole thing can be read at The New Yorker. My only quibble, and it is a minor one, is that the writer makes Allah and the Lord God of biblical creation two seperate dieties. It perpetuates the fundy idea that Allah is not the same God they worship. Not that it matters. I mean, it's all fairy tales anyway.

Fairy tales; get it?
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